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3998596-dr-evil

Few mofos are quite as eccentric as Dr. Evil, a man who sported meat helmets and a clean-shaven scrotum as a child. However, with talk of shorn scroti, you know his score isn't gonna be very good.

The Doctor has gone to great lengths to try and take over the world and thwart the plan-foiling exploits of his nemesis, superstar superspy Austin Powers. Yet, in between laser-beam experiments and holding the world hostage for One Million Dollars, Dr. Evil has his own problems, ranging from the lack of respect he seems to always get or trying to win the affections of his own son, Scott. That, and that possessed chair of his.

He indeed has loyal people on his side - Number Two, Mini-Me, the dude with the Lucky Charms, that old Nazi chick he has the hots for - but Dr. Evil lacks the focus and the luck to be a truly bad bad guy. Until then, he will simply be a frickin' imitation of your run-of-the-mill Bond supervillain, just funnier.

INTELLIGENCE - 8: Very clever mofo who has cheated time and death with ingenious inventions.

POWER - 2: As much physical prowess as a hot pocket... an Eggo... or Mr. Bigglesworth.

VILENESS - 7: Will resort to cruel punishment to make an example out of those who oppose him, including doing the Macarena.

SWAY - 3: Constantly shown up by his wiseacre son and hungry miniature twin.

PURITY - 9: Driven by greed and revenge, the good doctor rarely gives up even when the odds are against him.

PHYSICAL - 3: Frightening... in a fashion sense sorta way.

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